DeMarCaTionVille

Much ado has been made over Marsha Blackburn shelling out campaign dough to her daughter for whatever work her daughter performed on behalf of the campaign. Perhaps hoping to avoid the same political pitfall, Mike Faulk announced last week his daughter, Katherine, would be serving as his campaign Finance Director.

This allowed him to get the news out before someone else could give it a spin, which annoyed me.  Really, really annoyed me.
In fact, I’ve been mad about it the whole week long.

See, I had already gone through the trouble of downloading Faulk’s campaign finance reports, bought a new calculator to add things up and spent time surfing around the Arkansas Secretary of State website, so I could post about how Faulk gives himself a reimbursement for mileage to rival that of a longhaul trucker, how he’d paid his daughter’s Arkansas corporation, KLF AND COMPANY, almost 10k in consulting fees (well, if you deduct her $1000 donation to dear ol’ dad, technically it would be less) and how some of the names on Faulk’s campaign donor report are people whom, I suspect, are still wearing their “I Heart the State Income Tax” t-shirts.

I had this lovely blogger fantasy about how if I’d post it, they would come (they being readers.)

We’d all sit around and discuss whether this counts as nepotism and does it make a difference if compensated kinfolk are qualified? (According to Faulk’s announcement, his daughter earned a Masters Degree in Political Management at George Washington University and was Finance Director for the Asa Hutchinson for Governor Campaign in 2006 in Arkansas. Her political fund raising includes a stint with the Republican National Committee. Charitable fund raising is also in her background having served as the Finance Director for the Arkansas Prostate Cancer Foundation and as an associate at Orr & Associates, a Washington-based organization specializing in helping charities. He didn’t mention the corporation though. He must have forgotten it.)

I’d be understanding and point out how it could be beneficial to have a finance director you trust. Then, you wouldn’t have to worry about them stealing money or pointing out what portions of your money came from one of those political hokey-poky situations (you know where a maxed-out donor puts their money into a PAC, the PAC takes the money out and gives it to the candidate unless the PAC is already maxed out. Then, they’ll turn the money around, give it to another PAC, who will shake it all about, and then give it to the candidate.

That’s what it’s all about.
(In the real world, it’s called money laundering. In politics, it’s called legal.)

Next, the readers and I would talk about how the corporation was started in August 2007 – around the same time Faulk received Blackburn’s endorsement. We’d speculate that the Congresspersonman gave him pointers.

We’d move on to deliberating upon whether comping yourself $420 a week for mileage seems fair and finally decide he should just buy a damn Prius. David Oatney would come over. He’d assure us Faulk is a nice guy and it’s common for candidates to stump around the district and reimburse themselves for mileage. (Of course, Faulk is not stumping through the district. He’s stumping through Nashville and must be driving a Peterbilt to get there.)

Rob Huddleston might stop by to politely concur with Oatney about Faulk. He’d then remind me that Faulk’s opponent, Mike Williams, is not a Republican and was never a true Republican: the whole John Wilder mess is proof. He might also mention that Williams has been voted by the Shiny Tennessee Republican Business Newspaper of Republicans for Republicans who Have Republican Businesses or not but are Just Republican as Senator most likely to poke little ol’ ladies in the eye with his mustache.

I’d point out the flaws in the “GOP doesn’t tolerate party disloyalty” argument since Ron Ramsey is now doin’ a little fund raising for Rosalind Kurita . I also suggest that Faulk and Ramsey might wanna carpool.

At some point, Oatney would insult me. Not horrible insults. Just mild ones. I wouldn’t be mad.
To make sure there were no hard feelings, I’d invite everyone over for cake.

Yes, this was my vision – but it’s ruined now. Faulk had to go and mess it up by making his announcement before I could make his announcement – which takes the fun out of it. So I’ve decided not to blog about it at all. What’s the point?

As a matter of fact, after watching how Mike and Marsha operate, I’ve learned quite a bit about Republicans and what the offspring of Republicans should expect from their parents. Furthermore, since my Republican Daddy reads this blog (he pretends he doesn’t, but I know he does) I’d like him to know I’ve decided to embrace this whole Republican Daughter Behavior 101 lesson.

Considering that I’ve worked for him quite a bit this past year, I don’t think he should be surprised when he gets my bill in the mail next week.

And that’s the only reason I mentioned it at all.

Tags: 4th District, blogging, Campaign Finance, David Oatney, Marsha Blackburn, Mike Faulk, Mike Williams, mileage reimbursement, political daughters, Ron Ramsey, Rosalind Kurita, Tn State Senate