What is it about a brand new package of pristine white socks that compels kids to wear them outdoors in red clay mud with no shoes on their feet? Why do I suspect this phenomenon is caused by a mysterious cotton-treating chemical used by sock companies as part of a convoluted conspiracy cooked-up by the Oxy-Clean corporation and Republicans?
And would it be possible for Mothers’ to counter the sock soiling conspiracy by just purchasing gray or light brown socks and embracing dingy white as fashionable?
Who all is with me?
